torek, 07. maj 2013

Sestavljam si vesolje
Building up my universe


Pride čas, ko si je treba ponovno sestaviti vesolje.
There comes a time when you have to rebuild universe again.

Ponavadi sem to storila v dneh globoke brezvoljnosti, ki je ni bilo moč pojasniti,
v času meglenega brezupa, neopisljive ravnodušnosti in … niča brez konca in kraja.
Takrat, ko ne pomaga res nič, sežem po sestavljanki iz otroštva.
I have usually been doing this in days of deep apathy that could not be explained,
in the time of a foggy hopelessness, indescribable indifference and … an endless and placeless nothing.
In the time when really nothing helps I reach for my childhood puzzle.

S sestro sva jo dobili za Dedka Mraza, ko sva bili še obe predšolski
in že takrat me je začaral ta krog pokrajin.
Potem je za dolgo let izginila iz mojega življenja in se spet vrnila, ko sem bila že odrasla.
My sister and I had got it for a New Year’s gift when we were both still preschool girls
and I remember being so fascinated by this landscape circle.
One day it disappeared from my life and then returned again when I was already grown up.

Oh, če kaj, potem ta sestavljanka slika moje prvinske predstave!
Tisti otroški pogled na svet, upanje, lepoto, raznolikost, povezanost,
enost, brezmejnost, čarobni krog, ki se vrti in vrti in vrti.
Oh, if anything then it is this puzzle that paints my primal imagination!
A child view to the world, hope, beauty, diversity, povezanost, being one, borderlessness,
the magic circle that goes around and around and around.

In takrat enkrat, ko je bil svet spet enkrat brez pomena,
so se mi oči zataknile na tej škatli in sem počasi začela sestavljati koščke.
Sploh ne morem opisati počutja!
Vame so počasi polzeli vsi tisti občutki miru, ravnotežja
in počasi počasi se je netila iskrica življenjske strasti.
Ponovno sem si sestavila vesolje.
And one day when the world had seemed once again without meaning
my eyes were caught by this box that came back in my life again.
I slowly started composing those pieces.
I cannot even describe how I felt at the time!
All those feelings of peace and balance moving back inside of me
and slowly slowly the sparkle of life passion was waking up.
I rebuilt my own universe again.

Kadar sestavljam to svoje vesolje, prebivam v vseh teh čudovitih pokrajinah,
pokrajinah, tako čarobnih, da sem se kot otrok vsakič mučila izbrati eno sámo,
tisto popolno, najlepšo, najprivlačnejšo, tisto, v kateri bi živela,
pa mi nikoli ni uspelo odločiti se, ker so mi bile ena bolj pravljična od druge.
When I build this universe, my universe, I reside in all those wonderful landscapes,
landscapes so magical that I had tortured myself as a child every time to choose a single one,
that the most perfect, most beautiful and attractive, the one I would live in,
but I never succeeded to decide because I considered one more fairytale-like than another.

Odkrivala sem tudi pokrajine v ljudeh. V ljudeh je tako veliko čudovitih pokrajin.
V opravah, ki sem jih občudovala, v tako pisanih srcih ljudi, ki jih premore ta naša Zemlja
in katerih sklenjeni krog se zaradi pokrajin v njih samih pne onkraj vesolja.
I had been also discovering the landscapes in people. There are so many wonderful landscapes in people.
In folk costumes that I have been admiring, in such colourful hearts of humans that our Earth is
enriched by and because the landscapes within themselves their rounded up circle is rising beyond space.

Ja, take kroge sem sestavljala takrat in spet jih, enako kot prej,
vsako vrstico posebej, vrstico za vrstico, brez prehitevanja z naslednjo.
Najprej zunanji krog in potem navznoter, v samo središče, v bistvo.
Ko vstavim zadnji košček, je kot da bi našla seme življenja.
Yes, this kind of circles I had been building then and I do again, the same way like before,
one row at the time, row after row, without overtaking with the next one.
First the outer circle and then towards inside, into the centre itself, into the essence.
When I insert the final piece I feel like I have found the seed of life.

Pokrajine, v katere se potapljam in jih vedno nanovo odkrivam, tiste v naravi in tiste v ljudeh,
središče obojega pa je tukaj in tam, povsod in nikjer, zdaj in takrat, nikoli in vedno.
Moj popolni krog. Moja mala zasebna terapija. Da najdem spet svoj svet,
svoje bistvo, stik z vsem, nov zagon, da poženem spet ta svoj popolni krog.
The landscapes into which I dive and rediscovering every time anew,
those in the nature and those in the people, but the centre of both is
here and there, everywhere and nowhere, now and then, never and always.
My perfect circle. My little private therapy. To find my world again, my essence,
the connection with everything, a new kickoff, to drive my circle again.

Nedavno sem ga prvič sestavila iz nasprotnega razloga - ker sem letela na krilih energije,
ga takoj nato razdrla in dala sestaviti še Miru.
Se je na koncu pohecal, da si je sestavil mandalo. Pa res! :)
Recently it was the first time I wanted to put it together because I was flying on the wings of my energy,
then I destroyed it and gave it to Miro to built it.
At the end he smiled and provoked me that he has built himself a mandala. So he did! :)

7 komentarjev:

  1. Čudovito je to tvoje vesolje in nadvse mi je všeč tvoj dotik pisane besede ...

    Vse dobro ...

    OdgovoriIzbriši
    Odgovori
    1. Hvala, Odmevi srca, vse dobro tudi tebi! :)

      Izbriši
  2. Iskren zapis. Lep.
    Kdo pa je izdelal sestavljanko? Kdo ve, če se jo dobi kje prek neta...neverjetna je, ni čudno, da te je začarala.

    OdgovoriIzbriši
    Odgovori
    1. Unicefova je. Sem že brskala po spletu, pa je nisem našla, samo ene dva primerka (med drugim tudi na Etsy-ju), kjer jo prodajajo, rabljeno seveda.

      Škoda, da ni več na voljo, motiv je res večen.

      Izbriši
    2. Aja, še to, če se slučajno zanimaš zanjo, mi piši na mejl, pa ti pošljem link/e, kje sem jo zasledila. Piše, da je vintič in rariteta, kdo bi si mislil, da smo že tako stari! :)

      Izbriši
  3. Ojla, ja se zanimam, smo "puzlefani". Lahko mi na mail pod kontakti na blogu pošlješ link, bom res vesela. Stari, ma kaki :))

    OdgovoriIzbriši

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